Losing a beloved pet is never easy. And, it can take time for life to feel "normal" again without your special friend. But, it's important to know what to expect after your pet's death, and how to grieve a pet healthily.
IT'S OKAY TO NOT BE OKAY
If you are struggling to cope with the death of a pet, we urge you to contact a pet loss support center.
What happens when your beloved pet dies
Pet loss is difficult for any pet parent, regardless of how your animal companion passed away. Health problems like cancer and old age are the most common causes of death for cats and dogs.
If your pet passes away at an animal hospital, you may have the option to receive your pet's ashes. If you lose your pet at home, you can visit your local humane society for private cremation services. Cremation is not necessary for your cherished pet, but some pet parents prefer this option.
DID YOU KNOW?
It's common for society to deem the loss of a pet as insignificant. This stigma around pet loss may cause a pet parent to feel ashamed or feel guilty about their grief. This is called disenfranchised grief — when you don't have a place to put your feelings after a pet loss.
Stages of grief
Grief is an important but painful process for pet parents struggling with the death of a pet. The grieving process is a different personal experience for everyone, and it may bring unique challenges and emotional pain.
But, understanding the stages of the grief process may shed light on the feelings you have during your grief journey.
Denial
It may take some time for your feelings to sink in after a pet's death. You may think to yourself, "This cannot be happening," or "This is not real."
The feelings of denial, especially during the dying process, help pet parents slow down their grief. But, once you accept the reality of losing a pet, you can begin the healing process.
Anger
It's normal to feel angry during the grieving process. Losing a pet can feel unfair, especially if their passing was unexpected.
Bargaining
Bargaining happens when a pet parent needs to escape from their pain and grief. Reminding yourself that there is nothing you can do to bring your pet back may be helpful during this stage.
Depression
Feelings of depression usually occur once the reality of the pet loss sinks in. Pet parents grieving their lost pet may experience:
- Sadness
- Loss of motivation
- Difficulty sleeping
- Loss of appetite
Seeking support from family and friends or a medical professional is important during this stage. Give yourself the grace to feel sad during this time — but avoid negative feelings that could be harmful to yourself or others.
Acceptance
Accepting the feelings of losing a pet and the reality of the situation is the first step to moving on. Acceptance does not mean you have forgotten your pet and no longer feel pain or grief. But, it means you are ready to move forward in life.
6 ways to grieve the loss of a pet
There is no right or wrong way to approach pet grieving. But, here are six helpful ways for pet parents to help cope with grieving the death of a pet.
1. Take time for yourself.
Sticking to your daily routines as much as possible may help you maintain normalcy while experiencing pet loss. Coping looks different for everyone, but continuing your normal routine and taking time to care for yourself can be helpful.
Throughout the day, take time to:
- Read a book
- Exercise
- Watch your favorite TV show or movie
- Eat a healthy diet
- Continue your hobbies
Seeking emotional support by talking to family members or a friend may also be helpful during the adjustment period.
2. Honor your pet's death.
Every pet parent's personal beliefs are different. But, you may find peace in believing in a higher power.
When your pet dies, having an intimate memorial service for your animal companion may bring you some closure. Pet parents may want to bury their pet's ashes in a meaningful place, or reflect on their pet's memory with loved ones.
3. Remember your pet's life.
Remember the positive parts of the life you shared with your cat or dog. Associate happy memories with your pet to help you feel more positive feelings than negative as you move through life.
Try looking through past photos of happy memories you shared with your special friend. It may help to remind yourself that your pet lived a good life with their beloved person — you!
4. Spend time with your other pets.
If you have surviving pets, they may also struggle with the grieving process. When pets have a special bond with one another, they may experience their own grief.
Your surviving pets may be feeling sad, refuse to eat or drink, or seem uninterested in playtime. These behaviors are perfectly normal for a pet coping with a death.
Be sure to give your other pets love and attention throughout your grief journey. After all, they lost a family member and friend too.
5. Consider becoming a pet owner again.
If you're ready to add a new animal or pet to your family, it doesn't mean you don't care about the pet you lost. Be proud of your grief journey, and express gratitude to the friends and family who helped you cope with the pain.
It's okay to feel excited to make new memories with your new pet. As you move through life, you will have many more experiences and happy moments with your new pet.
There's no question that it's difficult to grieve the loss of a pet. Find support in talking to family and friends, remember the good memories you shared with your pet, and give yourself time to cope with the pain of grief.
A wellness subscripton for your best friend
